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Nessie

A Parish Councillor

He is very tall, well-proportioned, well-preserved and very kind; well-versed in many fields : engineering, woodwork, public relations – a valuable member of the Parish Council, manager and promoter of an orchestra, father of a pretty blond and husband of an excellent cook.

A great lover of music, too, but I do not want to compromize him by disclosing who his favourite composer is. Together we have founded a music-appreciation class, devoted to this particular composer. Whoever wants to join us, is welcome.

He is the typical practically-minded English handyman who knows the answers to all the household problems, a most useful member of the family from the housewife’s point of view, being a specialist for broken down washing machines, sewing machines, TV sets, refrigerators, record players and anything at all that might occur. Needless to say, he is his own car mechanic. His secret is, I understand, to sit down when everybody else has given up and quietly contemplate the mechanics of the appliance in question.

He also makes up new appliances as required for individual needs, like electric alarm installations for bed-ridden people : a switch for the patient, the main part being a match-box, a flex, and a flash lamp placed outside the door. He is an expert cherry picker, having contrived his own ways and means of reaching even the remotest cherry.

He is very socially minded and always willing to help. People know this and rely on him when faced with disaster, like a burst pipe in anybody’s house in the middle of the night. He does not mind interrupting his sleep and comes to settle the problem.

He likes to greet the ladies by kissing them on their cheeks. I was not too keen at first, but have become used to it. After all, this is England.