{"id":134,"date":"2024-10-21T09:40:43","date_gmt":"2024-10-21T09:40:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.d-c-k.com\/mme-el\/?p=134"},"modified":"2024-10-21T09:40:43","modified_gmt":"2024-10-21T09:40:43","slug":"language-and-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.d-c-k.com\/mme-el\/language-and-love\/","title":{"rendered":"Language and love"},"content":{"rendered":"
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F<\/span>or all her want of memory Mme El remains fully motivated <\/span>for the subject she is most interested in and which when <\/span>addressed will produce prompt, clear, logical reactions.<\/span>
This subject is love and everything to do with it. She likes to <\/span>deal with it in<\/span> Oc, as in her favourite dictum<\/span> manja ou dremi <\/span>ou l\u2019amour entreteni<\/span> \u2013 eat or sleep or love, which one do you <\/span>prefer, she asks me. I hold back my answer and she volunteers <\/span>that she prefers<\/span> manja<\/span>. Then she answers for me \u2018you prefer <\/span>love, coquine!\u2019 and a bit later still that I\u2019m quite right and <\/span>really she, too, prefers love.<\/span>
In the routine of every-day life love, for her, is limited to <\/span>marriage and marital fidelity, a moral issue, \u2018marcher droit\u2019, <\/span>walk straight, that\u2019s what she learnt from her grandma. The <\/span>wife lives for the husband, helps him, supports him, makes the <\/span>burden of life easier for him. She expects that he pays back in <\/span>the same way and woe to him if he doesn\u2019t! I understand that <\/span>in respect of love her grandma didn\u2019t clamp down on her son <\/span>as she did on her granddaughter.<\/span>
Certainly Mme El was devoted to her husband. When he <\/span>died she fell very ill and nearly died, too, prompting tears in <\/span>Gerrer\u2019s eyes. Subsequently she took to greeting him every <\/span>day in her diary by writing \u2018bonjour, Bernard\u2019. She has a diary <\/span>with a page for every day and has always enjoyed writing and <\/span>writes well and with verve. Elegant lines and an ornamental <\/span>dash on capitals, like on the \u2018B\u2019, initial letter of her husband\u2019s <\/span>name, sometimes a long wriggle all the way down the page.<\/span>
She makes a point of greeting him in her diary every morning.<\/span>
The other day she had forgotten and I reminded her. But she <\/span>said with a deep look that it\u2019s been done already, the greeting.<\/span><\/p>\n

I told her that I greet my Maman every morning and she <\/span>concerned \u2018how old was she?\u2019 Then she proceeded to writing <\/span>\u2018bonjour\u2019 into her diary.<\/span>
Her father, I hear, whom she called by his surname like <\/span>everyone else and a nice name, too, meaning \u2018falcon\u2019 or <\/span>\u2018falcou\u2019<\/span>7<\/a><\/sup>Falcou, common patronym originating in latin (Falcon) widely spread in both northern and southern Europe in the form of Falke, Falcone, Falcon, Falcou and others, the latter particularly present in the \u2018d\u00e9partement\u2019 Aude while Falcon occurs most in Haute Loire and Ain<\/span><\/span>, was a jolly man enjoying life, not working beyond <\/span>reasonable limits. She frequently says that without expanding <\/span>the point beyond a meaningful laugh. He was a passionate <\/span>hunter and a keen choir member. He brought his friends <\/span>home and her grandmother provided many a good meal for <\/span>the merry company. She mentions one in particular, \u2018De\u2026\u2019, <\/span>surname only, one of those who took an interest in her, the <\/span>motherless girl. I was \u2018g\u00e2t\u00e9e\u2019, she laughs, spoilt, and I don\u2019t <\/span>understand what she means, for I comment \u2018good for you\u2019 <\/span>which she dismisses without saying much except \u2018bah\u2019. I <\/span>wonder did they give her presents, but she waves this idea <\/span>aside, saying that she doesn\u2019t remember and then with a <\/span>stern face \u2018imagine these men who all had wives\u2026 how can <\/span>they\u2026 no ! It isn\u2019t right\u2026 they shouldn\u2019t and they mustn\u2019t, full <\/span>stop\u2019. She herself is for straight \u2013 \u2018droit\u2019, making the relevant <\/span>movement with her hand, \u2018marcher droit\u2019, she says yet again, <\/span>that\u2019s what her grandma taught her and that\u2019s what she has <\/span>done all her life. As for her father, she shrugs her shoulders. <\/span><\/p>\n

Her husband a \u2018coquin\u2019, she says repeatedly. Did he\u2026<\/span>
She doesn\u2019t know and it doesn\u2019t bother her, but certain <\/span>things she finds unforgivable. Is a man allowed to<\/span> look<\/span> at <\/span>another woman, I ask, you can\u2019t forbid that! She ponders a <\/span>little and then answers, no, he mustn\u2019t! I ask, did she ever look <\/span>at another man. She is a little bewildered at that before saying <\/span>a definite no. She distantly reminds me of my mother who no <\/span>doubt held similar views on this subject. Mme El\u2019s attitude is <\/span>marked by her grandmother Marie, also her mother\u2019s name <\/span>\u2013 as distinct from the merry grandfather? In reply Mme El <\/span>repeats \u2018I wouldn\u2019t have had a \u2018vadrouilleur\u2019 , thus making <\/span>clear what she understands by this word and she tells me <\/span>about somebody\u2019s friend\u2019s husband who forsook his wife for <\/span>the benefit of another woman, a relationship which, however,<\/span>
came to an end and the husband was received back into the <\/span>fold. \u2018Would<\/span> you<\/span> have had him back???\u2019 Mme El asked me, <\/span>eyes flashing, \u2018I wouldn\u2019t!\u2019. Didn\u2019t she look determined!<\/span><\/p>\n

Mme El : \u2018mon grand-p\u00e8re, mon p\u00e8re \u2026 des vadrouilleurs\u2019 <\/span>(ladies\u2019 men) <\/span>moi : \u2018je sais maintenant ce que vous entendez par l\u00e0!\u2019<\/span>
Mme El : \u2018vous vadrouillez?\u2019<\/span>
moi : \u2018et si je le faisais?\u2019<\/span>
Mme El : \u2018c\u2019est dangereux\u2026\u2019<\/span>
moi :???<\/span>
Mme El : \u201cle mari\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Translation<\/span><\/em>
Mme El: \u2018my grandfather, my father \u2026 they were roaming\u2019<\/span>
I: \u2018I now know what you mean by that!\u2019<\/span>
Mme El: \u2018Do you roam?\u2019<\/span>
I: \u2018What if I did?\u2019<\/span>
Mme El: \u2018That\u2019s dangerous\u2026\u2019<\/span>
I : ???<\/span>
Mme El: \u2018the husband\u2026\u2019<\/span><\/p>\n

Mme El is obviously quite capable of shifting the focus from <\/span>moral to practical. Love is \u2018amusant\u2019, amusing she says. Not <\/span>that she would have allowed herself to look for amusement <\/span>elsewhere.<\/span><\/p>\n